God or man!
I was sweating profusely in that dimly lit underground temple. The Brahmin was chanting the mantras as if a dancing, giggling, foaming mountain stream jumping from stone to stone and falling loose showering millions of water drop…..The Brahmin put the bel patta, milk, misri then banana on the siva linga and again chant the mantras. One after the other, all the Brahmins came to pay their first prayer to Lord Siva in that early morning, as if coming to sign the register book showing their presence.
I thought this is their duty…their bread and butter……but are they happy? Living the entire life in two pieces of saffron or white cloth, acting like the mouth piece for the god and pretending as if taking all our prayers straight to the god and accepting the gold and silver nagas (cobras), the gifts the devoting offering to the god and taking all their sins on their shoulders…Is it that easy? I was confused. It was damn hot outside…may be 42-43 degrees…the earth was almost boiling and in that dingy temple ,the incense sticks and the dhup sticks along with the burning lamps creating a smoky atmosphere suffocating the mass to the hell. I thought about Lord Siva….How on earth he can stay in this atmosphere through out the day from time immemorial but never complained any of his devotees that he too is getting suffocated with this!
“Maharudra….he! mruntyunjaya” shouted another person almost throwing a pitcher full of water on the Siva linga. I got the shivering with that sudden sound and the way he called the god………tear drops rushed out of my eyes mingling with the sweat, choking my throat. I was not with my self. What for I was crying I didn’t have any clue but I couldn’t have any control over my tears. The Brahmin asked me about my wish before god and the reason for this Jalasajya…..I thought but couldn’t answer….I said, “Tell for our well being and success….keep us in good health and in company of good people….then suddenly I got confused…..Why we need to utter this before god, why god can’t see what we want actually! I got startled when the Brahmin asked in a high tone, “Anything else you want to convey to god.” I looked at him in awe and said, “No.” I thought , ‘ How can I convey to god the amount of mental strain I am taking for nothing’ ‘How can I convey god the amount of effort I am putting to put every to put it into right track only to found every thing going off track!’ ‘How can I convey to the god the amount of accusation I am taking without even a single fault of mine!’ ‘How can I convey him that in spite of having every thing, why I am feeling so lonely, so drained at times…….’
Another Brahmin escorted one more couple to that place and they sat side wise quite close to us. The wife was looking quite depressed and the husband somehow looking quite tired. They were accompanied with a basketful of belpatta. With every mantra and a pitcher full of water they were said to put one Belpatta on top of the Siva Linga. I could make out that husband was not well for which they had come to the god as last resort. Suddenly my heart got filled with some unknown sorrow. I thought, they are staying in their own land, own people, still what an irony the destiny is playing with them! I concentrated on the Siva Linga and tried to tie up my distracted mind a bit…….
The “Jala sajya” was completed and we came out of the temple. The temple was already filled with the hustle and bustle of the devotees.
The fresh gush of clean air, I inhale in and looked back into that dingy temple.
I thought, ‘this Sivalinga was supposed to be in the open air. Somebody must have thought to make this a temple. And with this temple the god got famous and day by day got rich too. But what he got at last suffocated days, grumbling people ,selfish interests and accusing souls always roaming around him………And people are so greedy that they can’t even see how suffocating it is to remain like god forever inside that smoke filled dingy room…..
‘oh! Thank god you made me a human being and thank god! You gave me every thing for which I can escape and breathe some fresh air, whenever I am in utmost need…...’
While coming back, my mischievous mind plotted some plots and started working upon too……..I thought, “ if in point of time god suddenly got converted into a tiger and howl and maul a few devotees who are bothering him so much day in day out and the priests there , will these people again go to suffocate him in that dingy room !….
‘No….They will leave that place deserted……
I thought, ‘May be I am trying to act like god for which people are howling at me………..what about if I try someday to bite one or two just to see if they coming back again to suffocate me!
I was sweating profusely in that dimly lit underground temple. The Brahmin was chanting the mantras as if a dancing, giggling, foaming mountain stream jumping from stone to stone and falling loose showering millions of water drop…..The Brahmin put the bel patta, milk, misri then banana on the siva linga and again chant the mantras. One after the other, all the Brahmins came to pay their first prayer to Lord Siva in that early morning, as if coming to sign the register book showing their presence.
I thought this is their duty…their bread and butter……but are they happy? Living the entire life in two pieces of saffron or white cloth, acting like the mouth piece for the god and pretending as if taking all our prayers straight to the god and accepting the gold and silver nagas (cobras), the gifts the devoting offering to the god and taking all their sins on their shoulders…Is it that easy? I was confused. It was damn hot outside…may be 42-43 degrees…the earth was almost boiling and in that dingy temple ,the incense sticks and the dhup sticks along with the burning lamps creating a smoky atmosphere suffocating the mass to the hell. I thought about Lord Siva….How on earth he can stay in this atmosphere through out the day from time immemorial but never complained any of his devotees that he too is getting suffocated with this!
“Maharudra….he! mruntyunjaya” shouted another person almost throwing a pitcher full of water on the Siva linga. I got the shivering with that sudden sound and the way he called the god………tear drops rushed out of my eyes mingling with the sweat, choking my throat. I was not with my self. What for I was crying I didn’t have any clue but I couldn’t have any control over my tears. The Brahmin asked me about my wish before god and the reason for this Jalasajya…..I thought but couldn’t answer….I said, “Tell for our well being and success….keep us in good health and in company of good people….then suddenly I got confused…..Why we need to utter this before god, why god can’t see what we want actually! I got startled when the Brahmin asked in a high tone, “Anything else you want to convey to god.” I looked at him in awe and said, “No.” I thought , ‘ How can I convey to god the amount of mental strain I am taking for nothing’ ‘How can I convey god the amount of effort I am putting to put every to put it into right track only to found every thing going off track!’ ‘How can I convey to the god the amount of accusation I am taking without even a single fault of mine!’ ‘How can I convey him that in spite of having every thing, why I am feeling so lonely, so drained at times…….’
Another Brahmin escorted one more couple to that place and they sat side wise quite close to us. The wife was looking quite depressed and the husband somehow looking quite tired. They were accompanied with a basketful of belpatta. With every mantra and a pitcher full of water they were said to put one Belpatta on top of the Siva Linga. I could make out that husband was not well for which they had come to the god as last resort. Suddenly my heart got filled with some unknown sorrow. I thought, they are staying in their own land, own people, still what an irony the destiny is playing with them! I concentrated on the Siva Linga and tried to tie up my distracted mind a bit…….
The “Jala sajya” was completed and we came out of the temple. The temple was already filled with the hustle and bustle of the devotees.
The fresh gush of clean air, I inhale in and looked back into that dingy temple.
I thought, ‘this Sivalinga was supposed to be in the open air. Somebody must have thought to make this a temple. And with this temple the god got famous and day by day got rich too. But what he got at last suffocated days, grumbling people ,selfish interests and accusing souls always roaming around him………And people are so greedy that they can’t even see how suffocating it is to remain like god forever inside that smoke filled dingy room…..
‘oh! Thank god you made me a human being and thank god! You gave me every thing for which I can escape and breathe some fresh air, whenever I am in utmost need…...’
While coming back, my mischievous mind plotted some plots and started working upon too……..I thought, “ if in point of time god suddenly got converted into a tiger and howl and maul a few devotees who are bothering him so much day in day out and the priests there , will these people again go to suffocate him in that dingy room !….
‘No….They will leave that place deserted……
I thought, ‘May be I am trying to act like god for which people are howling at me………..what about if I try someday to bite one or two just to see if they coming back again to suffocate me!